What do winking, johnnies, and fancy underpants have in common?

A typical trip to the doctor that's what.
Friday morning I had my bi-annual skin check at the dermatologist.  Ahh, the joys of fair skin and freckles.  As I sat waiting in my pink paper Johnny I really started thinking about how silly they are.  They are really there to preserve some sort of modesty and comfort, but let's be real.  The doctor is about to do a skin exam.  Which involves looking at my entire body.  Nude.  The jig is up.  As I look at the stupid plastic belt that is there for..what?  To define my waist while I wait? I start to think..what if I just waited in my underwear.  Would that be weird?  Yes.  It would be I decided.  Of course every move you make you end up ripping some part, and it's wide open in the back and itchy.  It is the most ridiculous thing. 

The next part is my own ridiculous thing.  As I turn around so he can scan my back from top to feet I start to really reconsider my underwear choice.  I didn't think about them at all when I put them on. I was getting dressed for work.  Of course when you go to the doctor you should have at least presentable underwear.  That goes without saying.. but, as he moves the waistband to check around them, I wonder if a lacy thong was the right choice.  It seems like a little much for a doctors appointment.  Then I started wondering what the nurse practicioner who had to stay in the room during my exam was thinking.  Was she judging my underwear choice..?  I had to wonder.  I think there should be doctor approved underwear.  Something that says, I wear nice tidy underwear but doesn't give away all your fancy-ness under your pants.  I will think harder about this next doctors visit.

The third section is this.  I am a winker.  I don't know when it happend, but I have started winking at people.  My fantastic doctor informed me that he would be retiring from dermatology by the end of the year to persue his public speaking.  He is an amazing doctor, and a very spiritual person.  We have never talked about it but, you can feel it after your exam when you dress and go back into his office.  You see his passions and personality because he makes his office a refection of him. He is no stale doc.  To sit in his office is to know him.  We chatted briefly about is future endeavors and he refers me to my new doctor.  I tell him it was a pleasure being his patient and wish him luck.  He does the same...and tells me to enjoy the beautiful day. 
This is where I thank him and without even stopping to think give him a smile cock my head to the side and give him a wink. 
WHY whould I wink at my 60 something year old doctor?? Why would I wink at anyone???  And I do it all the time.  Now he has seen my fancy underpants and I'm winking at him.  Fantastic.