In the spirit of being thankful, I want to reflect on something I am really thankful I am not. This post is a little late to the party, and I'm sure it's things a lot of people have already said. However, I gotta say of all the things I wish I was a Chilean Miner is not one of them. Scratch that. ANY kind of Miner.
I am so thankful to NOT BE A MINER. I do wish I was a MINOR sometimes as I am not getting carded at an alarming rate these days..but, I digress.
First of all in general going deep into the earth to..well.. mine, doesn't sound like fun to me. It's dark, hot, moist, gross. I don't think I am cut out to do the work. But, throw in getting trapped way below the earth's surface might top my list of 'things I would not like to do this lifetime'. It may top my anti-bucket list.
When I hear that they didn't even know for over 2 weeks if they would get out, that itself would have made be go coo-coo and lose my sh&%!, I am in a cold sweat thinking about it. If I even survived that long when they did find me and told me I may have to wait 4 months to get out...I'm not sure that would be comforting to me. I imagine in my mind finding that super human strength that some people get when they move cars off their trapped children. I think I would be able to climb my way out. I'm serious.
Add to the fact that when they DID get out early they had to come up in a crazy tube ALONE. Forget it. I can't sit in the 93 tunnel in traffic without having an anxiety attack! If you missed that one you can find that gem here .
As I watched the dateline special of all the miners coming out (of course I was crying), I sent a text to MFC (my favorite carpenter if you haven't been following) saying I was really glad he was not a Chilean Miner as well. Somehow that sentiment doesn't translate well over text message...it sounds weird. Trust me on this one.
Some people say 'Hey, I like you. When you're gone, I kinda miss you'. Or you know..something of the sort. I say 'I'm really glad you're not a Chilean Miner right now'.
Yeah. I'm an adventure.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Friday, October 15, 2010
Things are about to get real.
So, in keeping with my theme of a year of change I am embarking on another adventure. I'm not going to lie, it may get dicey. I figure most things in my life are decidedly uprooted and evolving so why not add something else to the mix?
I have been feeling lately like my body has been...off. I can't put my finger on it. I gained 5 pounds, I mean I can put my finger on THAT. I can probably pinch an inch of that! However, when I look back to a year ago I was this weight, and I was happy and felt like I looked good. I have only really been that 5 pounds lighter in times of stress- when my grandfather passed, calling off my wedding-- you know really good times.
So, in reality five pounds less should equal bad. This five pounds should mean good. In reality I'm probably the only one who notices it, but I notice it. It's obnoxious.
But, I am not talking about it to be all 'wah, wahhh I'm fat'. No no no. I'm more concerned with my preoccupation with it.
So, I've been going crazy at the gym, trying to eat 'right' and my body is like 'Hey, Al I LOVE this five pounds. I love it so much I will fight you for it.'
This is when I saw my old high school friend *Elizabeth post on Facebook that she was going to be hosting a conference call talking about what she does and what it could do for me...when I say 'me' I mean, 'me' as we are ALL 'me' on facebook..like 'you'. What can she do for 'YOU'...'ME'..you know what I'm sayin'? Good. Me either.
Anyways, I listened in on this call and realized it is exactly what I need right now.
In an effort not to get all earthy crunchy cum-bah-ya on you the premise is basically eating 'whole foods', no processed stuff, limiting sugars, being mindful of eating, self aware, self caring and doing things for my body that feed it emotionally, physically and nutritionally.
This should be interesting. Not because I eat lots of chips and packaged foods..but, there is a cleanse involved. This will involve cutting out sugar, gluten, dairy, and a few other things I forget for 7 days.
I figured, I'm already definitely decaf...why not be definitely sugar free/gluten free/ dairy free for a few days.
The sugar scares me. I have a sweet tooth like you read about. If you haven't read about it..see below. Yeah. You just did.
I start the first 'goal' tomorrow. Eating a whole food breakfast.
I suddenly had the urge tonight to rebel. I was getting things ready to make this fabulous 'dessert pizza' for a party tomorrow...this involved me toasting coconut, and opening packages of chocolate chips, butterscotch chips, and white chocolate chips. Before I knew it...All of the above were atop a lovely bowl of frozen yogurt.
When Definitely Decaf starts to sound 'Definitely Angry'...then you will know that sugar is out.
SAVE YOURSELVES!
If you are interested in learning more about fabulous Elizabeth--who is in fact fabulous even if she wears devil horns as she takes sugar away from me, PLEASE check her out here .
I will probably post a bit about this process, and Elizabeth is NOT paying me to write about it..just an FYI. She is the real deal. Always has been!
I have been feeling lately like my body has been...off. I can't put my finger on it. I gained 5 pounds, I mean I can put my finger on THAT. I can probably pinch an inch of that! However, when I look back to a year ago I was this weight, and I was happy and felt like I looked good. I have only really been that 5 pounds lighter in times of stress- when my grandfather passed, calling off my wedding-- you know really good times.
So, in reality five pounds less should equal bad. This five pounds should mean good. In reality I'm probably the only one who notices it, but I notice it. It's obnoxious.
But, I am not talking about it to be all 'wah, wahhh I'm fat'. No no no. I'm more concerned with my preoccupation with it.
So, I've been going crazy at the gym, trying to eat 'right' and my body is like 'Hey, Al I LOVE this five pounds. I love it so much I will fight you for it.'
This is when I saw my old high school friend *Elizabeth post on Facebook that she was going to be hosting a conference call talking about what she does and what it could do for me...when I say 'me' I mean, 'me' as we are ALL 'me' on facebook..like 'you'. What can she do for 'YOU'...'ME'..you know what I'm sayin'? Good. Me either.
Anyways, I listened in on this call and realized it is exactly what I need right now.
In an effort not to get all earthy crunchy cum-bah-ya on you the premise is basically eating 'whole foods', no processed stuff, limiting sugars, being mindful of eating, self aware, self caring and doing things for my body that feed it emotionally, physically and nutritionally.
This should be interesting. Not because I eat lots of chips and packaged foods..but, there is a cleanse involved. This will involve cutting out sugar, gluten, dairy, and a few other things I forget for 7 days.
I figured, I'm already definitely decaf...why not be definitely sugar free/gluten free/ dairy free for a few days.
The sugar scares me. I have a sweet tooth like you read about. If you haven't read about it..see below. Yeah. You just did.
I start the first 'goal' tomorrow. Eating a whole food breakfast.
I suddenly had the urge tonight to rebel. I was getting things ready to make this fabulous 'dessert pizza' for a party tomorrow...this involved me toasting coconut, and opening packages of chocolate chips, butterscotch chips, and white chocolate chips. Before I knew it...All of the above were atop a lovely bowl of frozen yogurt.
When Definitely Decaf starts to sound 'Definitely Angry'...then you will know that sugar is out.
SAVE YOURSELVES!
If you are interested in learning more about fabulous Elizabeth--who is in fact fabulous even if she wears devil horns as she takes sugar away from me, PLEASE check her out here .
I will probably post a bit about this process, and Elizabeth is NOT paying me to write about it..just an FYI. She is the real deal. Always has been!
Monday, October 11, 2010
Sucking it up.
If you have been following my blog from the beginning, I think we can all agree this has been quite a year of change. In terms of my 'blog year'..I think I started last December, just the last ten months has been a pattern of dramatic shifts.
I have definitely become more self aware, hopefully not to be confused with self centered. Friday was a defining moment.
I teach dance for a woman who once was my dance teacher in High School and owns her own studio now. She knows I have a bit of time right now as I am in between jobs and told me about a 'Master Dance Class' in 'Musical Theatre Dance' that was to be hosted at one of her dance teacher meetings. The class was open. I haven't really taken a dance class in quite some time, I was in.
I figured it was an hour.
When I arrived the meeting was still going on and I was chatting with a really nice girl whom I assumed was my age outside of the dance space. She was in from Philadelphia and her family owns a dance school in Massachusetts. Great. I know I'm rusty.
She tells me the town she grew up in--right next door to my home town. I know lots of people from her town. 'What year did you graduate?'
'05'.
Me: 'oh..yeah..I've got a couple of years on you..' I mentally do the math and cringe that I assumed we were the same age..
Girl: 'Oh, well my sister graduated in '03!'
Me: 'Yeah...still older'.
I was out of college before her and her sister graduated High School. Great. I'm going into this class with young, cute girls who are still actively dancing. Awesome.
Then we found out that he was not teaching Musical Theatre Dance...he wanted to do 'Contemporary Ballet'.
When you haven't taken a class in years and you show up for a Master Class and someone says Ballet..it is a totally natural reaction to want to crap your pants.
Ballet is not something to just jump into one day. Trust me on this one.
So, I suck it up and go in. I was pleasantly surprised to find that his version of Contemporary Ballet is very free form, and I am doing fine. His movement is comfortable to me. He is easy on the eyes and the age range of the class was mainly about 23-50-ish. I'm totally fine.
Until his first combination about an hour into class. Yeah. I thought class was an hour. It ended up being 2 hours.
Anyways, because I have been out of the class so long I am having a hard time picking up the routine quickly. Did I mention I'm competitive? I have a real problem when I don't feel like I am one of the best in the class. It pisses me off. I want to be the best or I don't want to do it. This is NOT a pretty side of me.
He then says the words almost everyone hates to hear : Let's do this in two groups.
Now, I have no problem with an instructor or any of the people watching knowing that I am struggling. I gave into that feeling. I DID however, have a problem with my dancing peers seeing me struggle. The jig is up. They are all gonna know that I suck. I have the urge to go up to the front of the class and say 'um I just want to let you guys know that I KNOW I am rusty. I know that I have not picked up the routine yet, and I am OK with you laughing at me. At one point I was a super quick learner and had great technique. Today is not that day..but, don't think I don't know!'.
I did not do this.
So, he puts on the music and the first group goes. I make the decision that I am just going to sit it out. I don't need to embarrass myself. I am all set. I am hostile. I'm mad at myself and embarrassed in my own head, I'm certainly not going to make an ass out of myself.
This is when I take a good look to my right. I see Nicole, a girl I used to have in dance class a couple of years ago. I want to say she is between 8 and 10. Her mom let her take the class. Nicole was watching me according to her mother the whole class because she was used to watching me..I told her mom to tell Nicole to 'save herself' I was no one to be watching today!
However, I thought in that moment about my choice to sit out. If she was in my class and wanted me to sit out, I would have been really mad. I would have had her sit in the front of the room and would have been super disappointed. I would have told her to try. I would have told her not to worry about what everyone else thought, and this is your moment for yourself. If you don't get the routine who cares? There will be another one that you WILL get, and you are doing yourself a dis-service by sitting out.
What kind of example was I about to set? Not a good one.
I jumped in with the second group. I messed up more times than I care to count. But, I did it.
I'm not 23. I'm not 25..I'm 30 years old. Time to swallow my pride, grow up and grow a pair.
So..turns out I wasn't the best. But, I finished the class. I felt good, and I have new resolve to take more dance classes. Even if I am not the best anymore, it feels good. If there is one thing I have learned this year is that not enough time has been spent on things that feel good. And another thing...apparently when you are an adult you are suppose to set examples. Go figure.
I have definitely become more self aware, hopefully not to be confused with self centered. Friday was a defining moment.
I teach dance for a woman who once was my dance teacher in High School and owns her own studio now. She knows I have a bit of time right now as I am in between jobs and told me about a 'Master Dance Class' in 'Musical Theatre Dance' that was to be hosted at one of her dance teacher meetings. The class was open. I haven't really taken a dance class in quite some time, I was in.
I figured it was an hour.
When I arrived the meeting was still going on and I was chatting with a really nice girl whom I assumed was my age outside of the dance space. She was in from Philadelphia and her family owns a dance school in Massachusetts. Great. I know I'm rusty.
She tells me the town she grew up in--right next door to my home town. I know lots of people from her town. 'What year did you graduate?'
'05'.
Me: 'oh..yeah..I've got a couple of years on you..' I mentally do the math and cringe that I assumed we were the same age..
Girl: 'Oh, well my sister graduated in '03!'
Me: 'Yeah...still older'.
I was out of college before her and her sister graduated High School. Great. I'm going into this class with young, cute girls who are still actively dancing. Awesome.
Then we found out that he was not teaching Musical Theatre Dance...he wanted to do 'Contemporary Ballet'.
When you haven't taken a class in years and you show up for a Master Class and someone says Ballet..it is a totally natural reaction to want to crap your pants.
Ballet is not something to just jump into one day. Trust me on this one.
So, I suck it up and go in. I was pleasantly surprised to find that his version of Contemporary Ballet is very free form, and I am doing fine. His movement is comfortable to me. He is easy on the eyes and the age range of the class was mainly about 23-50-ish. I'm totally fine.
Until his first combination about an hour into class. Yeah. I thought class was an hour. It ended up being 2 hours.
Anyways, because I have been out of the class so long I am having a hard time picking up the routine quickly. Did I mention I'm competitive? I have a real problem when I don't feel like I am one of the best in the class. It pisses me off. I want to be the best or I don't want to do it. This is NOT a pretty side of me.
He then says the words almost everyone hates to hear : Let's do this in two groups.
Now, I have no problem with an instructor or any of the people watching knowing that I am struggling. I gave into that feeling. I DID however, have a problem with my dancing peers seeing me struggle. The jig is up. They are all gonna know that I suck. I have the urge to go up to the front of the class and say 'um I just want to let you guys know that I KNOW I am rusty. I know that I have not picked up the routine yet, and I am OK with you laughing at me. At one point I was a super quick learner and had great technique. Today is not that day..but, don't think I don't know!'.
I did not do this.
So, he puts on the music and the first group goes. I make the decision that I am just going to sit it out. I don't need to embarrass myself. I am all set. I am hostile. I'm mad at myself and embarrassed in my own head, I'm certainly not going to make an ass out of myself.
This is when I take a good look to my right. I see Nicole, a girl I used to have in dance class a couple of years ago. I want to say she is between 8 and 10. Her mom let her take the class. Nicole was watching me according to her mother the whole class because she was used to watching me..I told her mom to tell Nicole to 'save herself' I was no one to be watching today!
However, I thought in that moment about my choice to sit out. If she was in my class and wanted me to sit out, I would have been really mad. I would have had her sit in the front of the room and would have been super disappointed. I would have told her to try. I would have told her not to worry about what everyone else thought, and this is your moment for yourself. If you don't get the routine who cares? There will be another one that you WILL get, and you are doing yourself a dis-service by sitting out.
What kind of example was I about to set? Not a good one.
I jumped in with the second group. I messed up more times than I care to count. But, I did it.
I'm not 23. I'm not 25..I'm 30 years old. Time to swallow my pride, grow up and grow a pair.
So..turns out I wasn't the best. But, I finished the class. I felt good, and I have new resolve to take more dance classes. Even if I am not the best anymore, it feels good. If there is one thing I have learned this year is that not enough time has been spent on things that feel good. And another thing...apparently when you are an adult you are suppose to set examples. Go figure.
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Wondering Wednesday: I'm up! I swear!
This Wednesday I am wondering....what is the big secret about sleeping? It's not a shameful act. We all do it, hopefully everyday. It isn't even an embarrassing thing to do!
So, why when my phone rang this morning and I realized I overslept a bit and decided to answer my friends call that the following occured:
1. I mentally prepared myself to give my best 'I've been up since 3AM cleaning the house, doing laundry, saving stray puppies, and you just caught me in the middle of my 99th set of jumping jacks' voice. I WILL sound alert. I'm up.
2. I cleared my throat to really prepare
3. When I answered I was proud of how awake I sounded
4. She said: 'OH GOD! I guess I woke you up! I'm sorry!' (Damn it!)
5. My initial response is to say- 'Oh, no! I'm up! You didn't wake me!'
For the record I did not follow through with #5 like I usually do. I admitted that it was raining and I totally had fallen back to sleep--which is really out of character for me..and I was annoyed with myself, but it felt so good!
I told her I was giving my best 'I'm totally awake voice' did I sound awake? She told me 'umm..no.'
I'm starting to think the fake awake voice is like most people who sing in the shower. It sounds really good in your head-- you really sound like..say..Celine Dion in the shower, but your spouse, friends, roomate, family, local robbers, neighbors beg to differ.
So again, now I wonder why do we lie about the sleep? No one will be offended, no one (unless it's your boss and your late for work) will be mad at you for sleeping.
I've even done it in the middle of the night when someone has called--No! It's 2:30AM, I'm SO AWAKE! This insomnia is crazy!
Maybe we feel bad about making the other person on the other end feel uncomfortable for waking us up? But, we've all also been that person--you feel bad, but it isn't going to make you cry or ruin your day!
Can we stop the madness and just say 'Yes, you woke me. I was sleeping. However, when I saw it was you calling I decided I was done sleeping and I did in fact want to talk to you!' Wouldn't that make everyone feel good?
OR even if you just said 'Um, I'm sorry I just woke up, or was sleeping. I answered the phone while I was dreaming and I have no idea what just happened in the last 3 minutes of our conversation..I'm not even positive who I am talking to or what I have told you about my life. (You know we have all been there too) Can I call you back in a little bit?'
Just wonderin'.
So, why when my phone rang this morning and I realized I overslept a bit and decided to answer my friends call that the following occured:
1. I mentally prepared myself to give my best 'I've been up since 3AM cleaning the house, doing laundry, saving stray puppies, and you just caught me in the middle of my 99th set of jumping jacks' voice. I WILL sound alert. I'm up.
2. I cleared my throat to really prepare
3. When I answered I was proud of how awake I sounded
4. She said: 'OH GOD! I guess I woke you up! I'm sorry!' (Damn it!)
5. My initial response is to say- 'Oh, no! I'm up! You didn't wake me!'
For the record I did not follow through with #5 like I usually do. I admitted that it was raining and I totally had fallen back to sleep--which is really out of character for me..and I was annoyed with myself, but it felt so good!
I told her I was giving my best 'I'm totally awake voice' did I sound awake? She told me 'umm..no.'
I'm starting to think the fake awake voice is like most people who sing in the shower. It sounds really good in your head-- you really sound like..say..Celine Dion in the shower, but your spouse, friends, roomate, family, local robbers, neighbors beg to differ.
So again, now I wonder why do we lie about the sleep? No one will be offended, no one (unless it's your boss and your late for work) will be mad at you for sleeping.
I've even done it in the middle of the night when someone has called--No! It's 2:30AM, I'm SO AWAKE! This insomnia is crazy!
Maybe we feel bad about making the other person on the other end feel uncomfortable for waking us up? But, we've all also been that person--you feel bad, but it isn't going to make you cry or ruin your day!
Can we stop the madness and just say 'Yes, you woke me. I was sleeping. However, when I saw it was you calling I decided I was done sleeping and I did in fact want to talk to you!' Wouldn't that make everyone feel good?
OR even if you just said 'Um, I'm sorry I just woke up, or was sleeping. I answered the phone while I was dreaming and I have no idea what just happened in the last 3 minutes of our conversation..I'm not even positive who I am talking to or what I have told you about my life. (You know we have all been there too) Can I call you back in a little bit?'
Just wonderin'.
Monday, October 4, 2010
Survival of the fittest?
This morning at the gym running I decided I was going to jump in on the Pilates class going on. I've taken pilates before and I know it is no joke-at ALL. But, I'm not gonna lie I was feeling a little cocky when I walked in and met Susan.
She did not appear to be very fit, and she wasted no time telling me she was close to the wall because she broke her pinky finger. I'm not entirely sure how these two thoughts fit together, but to her they made total sense and I didn't want to question. We chatted about how she did it and I got a full lay out of all of her ailments. We all know a Susan don't we?
Not to be out done, I shared a bit of my incident with the glass in my foot. She was concerned about my last tetanus shot, and of course of my impending infection. She made me a little paranoid.
Enter the teacher. A very fit older woman who has a few kids and grandchildren.
She has recently had a full hip replacement on her right side. I think to myself, PLEASE. I've GOT this class. I've got grandma and an artificial hip teaching me, and polly paranoia with her broken finger.
The next participant was a younger woman who I saw running earlier and I figured she was my competition....NOT that it is a competition. Right? Right. Not at all.
The next woman spoke no English--she was fit and adorable. However, I thought I had the advantage with the language barrier and all. I was going to be fine.
Yeah. I don't know what happened. It was a great class, yet one that I could not get through without stopping multiple times because my muscles were screaming inappropriate things at me. I kept looking at the clock thinking..did someone stop it?? It must be broken. That was NOT only 3 minutes.
The clock was fine. My ass was getting kicked by hypochondria superior to my right, and grandma with a plastic hip.
I feel awesome. Did I mention it is not a competition?
On another note I wanted to share some funny Google search words/phrases that have taken people to this blog:
-Yummy Feet
-Piggyback rides
-Pumas and cougars
I'm not sure I've talked about piggyback rides or yummy feet..but, whatever gets you here, I'm happy to have you in my crazy little world!
She did not appear to be very fit, and she wasted no time telling me she was close to the wall because she broke her pinky finger. I'm not entirely sure how these two thoughts fit together, but to her they made total sense and I didn't want to question. We chatted about how she did it and I got a full lay out of all of her ailments. We all know a Susan don't we?
Not to be out done, I shared a bit of my incident with the glass in my foot. She was concerned about my last tetanus shot, and of course of my impending infection. She made me a little paranoid.
Enter the teacher. A very fit older woman who has a few kids and grandchildren.
She has recently had a full hip replacement on her right side. I think to myself, PLEASE. I've GOT this class. I've got grandma and an artificial hip teaching me, and polly paranoia with her broken finger.
The next participant was a younger woman who I saw running earlier and I figured she was my competition....NOT that it is a competition. Right? Right. Not at all.
The next woman spoke no English--she was fit and adorable. However, I thought I had the advantage with the language barrier and all. I was going to be fine.
Yeah. I don't know what happened. It was a great class, yet one that I could not get through without stopping multiple times because my muscles were screaming inappropriate things at me. I kept looking at the clock thinking..did someone stop it?? It must be broken. That was NOT only 3 minutes.
The clock was fine. My ass was getting kicked by hypochondria superior to my right, and grandma with a plastic hip.
I feel awesome. Did I mention it is not a competition?
On another note I wanted to share some funny Google search words/phrases that have taken people to this blog:
-Yummy Feet
-Piggyback rides
-Pumas and cougars
I'm not sure I've talked about piggyback rides or yummy feet..but, whatever gets you here, I'm happy to have you in my crazy little world!
Sunday, October 3, 2010
and it feels just like I'm walkin' on broken glass...
Anyone else know that song? But, seriously.
Last night was a night of celebration for one of my best friends. She is taking the dive into thirty and last night was to be a pub crawl in Fanuiel Hall.
Before said crawl, I taught my dance classes, ran some errands and was cleaning up and doing stuff around the house. I had on my music pretty loud and there may have been dancing. I was plotting my outfit for the night which was going to include a fantastic pair of shoes that has only made it out of the house one other time. Trust me when I say they are ridiculous. At just about 5'9, I have no business or need for shoes this high. They are strappy and black and probably say a lot of things about me that I am not...they may have zippers and some sort of tassles. I love them. Anyways.
So, I was alone in the house. I had pulled out the full length mirror for when Siobhan and I were going to get ready..and I *may* have decided to dance in front of it, perhaps to practice my moves for the night. (Hey! I was alone!)
I should now tell you that during a storm the other day a vase that was next to my bed met it's demise with a gust of wind shattering it to a million tiny pieces on my hardwood bedroom floor. I thought I had swept up all the bits of glass...
When I stepped up to the mirror for my dance solo...I realized I was wrong. I felt the unmistakable stab of a tiny piece of glass in my foot.
I immediately remembered a story I think my best friend told me-- that one of her relatives got glass in his blood stream and it went to his heart and killed him. Naturally, I am sure death is imminent. Maybe I have about ten minutes left to live. I want to cry.
I pulled out the tweezers got a flashlight and tried to coax it out. A little bit of blood and no relief later I called it quits as I had to shower. I got ready to go out and by the time I was done, there were troops at my house.
Enter my surgical team: Siobhan and her friend who had just finished 2 pitchers of beer over a late lunch, and my favorite carpenter. (We were all going together to the crawl in the hall.)
I told my team about my foot, I had told my favorite carpenter (from now on referred to as MFC) that he could not look at my foot..they were badly in need of a pedicure. However, by the time Siobhan and her friend arrived on the scene, I was really concerned about my shoe situation and the dancing. I couldn't dance like this, or really walk normally.
Before I knew it my foot was up on our kitchen island a flashlight was out and my super buzzed roomate had a pair of tweezers on my foot. It was not working. Also, why was I letting drunk people get up in my feet? This is when MFC decided he was going to take over, this is when I decided that was a good idea. Until he said what he needed was a utility knife. Apparently as confirmed by Siobhan's friend..that's what guys do.
Thank God we didn't have a utility knife I thought. That is so not happening.
That's when Siobhan pulled one out of our drawer. Great.
This is also when I realized I really trust MFC. I mean, as he sat there slicing chunks out of my foot in search of the piece of glass there has to be a level of trust.
He got my foot to a place where I was sure the glass was out.
I sorta felt like he saved me life... you know.. 'cause I was dying and all.
This morning when I stepped out of bed, I felt that nasty little stab again. This is a case for my mother who prescribed a soak with salt, and some tape to try and grab it. Again, my foot feels OK.
So, if you are wondering here is what you need to get glass out of your foot:
1. A utility knife
2. MFC (or someone similar who knows how to work it)
3. Some rubbing alcohol to sterilize the tools
4. 2 drunk roomates/friends
5. Salt
6. Tupperwear with warm water
7. Packing tape.
I'm hoping I won't lose my foot after infection sets in.
Last night was a night of celebration for one of my best friends. She is taking the dive into thirty and last night was to be a pub crawl in Fanuiel Hall.
Before said crawl, I taught my dance classes, ran some errands and was cleaning up and doing stuff around the house. I had on my music pretty loud and there may have been dancing. I was plotting my outfit for the night which was going to include a fantastic pair of shoes that has only made it out of the house one other time. Trust me when I say they are ridiculous. At just about 5'9, I have no business or need for shoes this high. They are strappy and black and probably say a lot of things about me that I am not...they may have zippers and some sort of tassles. I love them. Anyways.
So, I was alone in the house. I had pulled out the full length mirror for when Siobhan and I were going to get ready..and I *may* have decided to dance in front of it, perhaps to practice my moves for the night. (Hey! I was alone!)
I should now tell you that during a storm the other day a vase that was next to my bed met it's demise with a gust of wind shattering it to a million tiny pieces on my hardwood bedroom floor. I thought I had swept up all the bits of glass...
When I stepped up to the mirror for my dance solo...I realized I was wrong. I felt the unmistakable stab of a tiny piece of glass in my foot.
I immediately remembered a story I think my best friend told me-- that one of her relatives got glass in his blood stream and it went to his heart and killed him. Naturally, I am sure death is imminent. Maybe I have about ten minutes left to live. I want to cry.
I pulled out the tweezers got a flashlight and tried to coax it out. A little bit of blood and no relief later I called it quits as I had to shower. I got ready to go out and by the time I was done, there were troops at my house.
Enter my surgical team: Siobhan and her friend who had just finished 2 pitchers of beer over a late lunch, and my favorite carpenter. (We were all going together to the crawl in the hall.)
I told my team about my foot, I had told my favorite carpenter (from now on referred to as MFC) that he could not look at my foot..they were badly in need of a pedicure. However, by the time Siobhan and her friend arrived on the scene, I was really concerned about my shoe situation and the dancing. I couldn't dance like this, or really walk normally.
Before I knew it my foot was up on our kitchen island a flashlight was out and my super buzzed roomate had a pair of tweezers on my foot. It was not working. Also, why was I letting drunk people get up in my feet? This is when MFC decided he was going to take over, this is when I decided that was a good idea. Until he said what he needed was a utility knife. Apparently as confirmed by Siobhan's friend..that's what guys do.
Thank God we didn't have a utility knife I thought. That is so not happening.
That's when Siobhan pulled one out of our drawer. Great.
This is also when I realized I really trust MFC. I mean, as he sat there slicing chunks out of my foot in search of the piece of glass there has to be a level of trust.
He got my foot to a place where I was sure the glass was out.
I sorta felt like he saved me life... you know.. 'cause I was dying and all.
This morning when I stepped out of bed, I felt that nasty little stab again. This is a case for my mother who prescribed a soak with salt, and some tape to try and grab it. Again, my foot feels OK.
So, if you are wondering here is what you need to get glass out of your foot:
1. A utility knife
2. MFC (or someone similar who knows how to work it)
3. Some rubbing alcohol to sterilize the tools
4. 2 drunk roomates/friends
5. Salt
6. Tupperwear with warm water
7. Packing tape.
I'm hoping I won't lose my foot after infection sets in.
Saturday, October 2, 2010
Adventures in babysitting.
This is called a lazy post...but, give me a break. It's the weekend. Even the unemployed need a moment you know.
A couple weekends ago I had the pleasure of watching my friends' (Jen and Kevin) kids. It was an overnight adventure. I asked Jen for some instructions. This is the email I recieved:
1:30 arrival/parent departure
1:45 kids will ask for a snack
2:00 kids will be climbing all over you laughing, giggling, screaming, fighting over your lap, and asking for piggy back rides
2:15 kids will ask for a snack
2:30 kids will probably decide they wanna play "friends" and will start talking to each other like adults, as well as talking to you like they are 25 and you're just one of their girlfriends
2:45 bella will tell you she doesn't have to go potty when you ask her to try
3:00 kids will ask for a snack
3:15 kids will ask for a show...madi will wanna watch berenstain bears and bella will wanna watch mickey mouse clubhouse. then they will fight with each other over whose turn it is to pick the show
3:30 bella will ask you for her binky. when you say 'no' she will tell you she needs it because she is gonna rest (the only time she gets her binky is when she is in bed)...she WILL NOT SLEEP
3:45 kids will ask for a snack
4:00 play outside? ask bella to try going potty
4:15 kids will claim they are bored and have nothing to do
4:20 bella will ask to take a nap with her binky (please note** she WILL NOT SLEEP)
4:30 kids will ask you what's for dinner and when it will be served because they will claim to be STARVING!
5:00ish dinner, ask bella to try going potty
5:30 color, play with dolls, playdough
6:00 bella will have an accident because she insisted she didn't need to go potty the last 6 times you asked her
6:30 wind down for bedtime, they will ask for as snack as soon as you ask them to brush their teeth
6:45 ask the to get into their pajamas, this will take 15 minutes, and bella might still be naked
7:00 ask them to get their beds & books ready, go potty
7:15 bella:books, sippy cup, songs, bed...don't mess up the words to anything, she will correct you
7:20 bella will call you in to tell you she forgot to say goodnight to madi
7:30 madi: books, songs, bed...don't mess up the words to anything, she will correct you
7:45 madi will get up and go potty, come downstairs to ask you what you are doing, and what time we will be home. she will then want another hug and for you to go back upstairs and tuck her into bed
8:00 you will think there is a truck in my house...don't worry..it's just madi snoring
you will watch tv, hangout, check your email, whatever...
as soon as you fall asleep bella will call you. when you get to her room she will tell you she dropped her binky. at this point you will get on your hands and knees in the dark and begin feeling around for it. she will be watching you and smiling
2:00AM you will be in a deep sleep having a pleasant dream. you will then hear bella calling for you.
you will go in her room where she'll smile at you and without even trying to move tell you she wet the bed. you will strip her down, change her pj's and put new bedding on the bed. she will watch you from her rocking chair, smiling. put her back to bed, turn on her music and don't try escaping the room before you sing twinkle, twinkle, little star.
go back to bed. you should be safe til the morning.
7:00AM madi will wake first, she'll come find you because she will be famished from her night sleep and need breakfast IMMEDIATELY! bella will follow in about 20 minutes...and the day repeats!!
1:45 kids will ask for a snack
2:00 kids will be climbing all over you laughing, giggling, screaming, fighting over your lap, and asking for piggy back rides
2:15 kids will ask for a snack
2:30 kids will probably decide they wanna play "friends" and will start talking to each other like adults, as well as talking to you like they are 25 and you're just one of their girlfriends
2:45 bella will tell you she doesn't have to go potty when you ask her to try
3:00 kids will ask for a snack
3:15 kids will ask for a show...madi will wanna watch berenstain bears and bella will wanna watch mickey mouse clubhouse. then they will fight with each other over whose turn it is to pick the show
3:30 bella will ask you for her binky. when you say 'no' she will tell you she needs it because she is gonna rest (the only time she gets her binky is when she is in bed)...she WILL NOT SLEEP
3:45 kids will ask for a snack
4:00 play outside? ask bella to try going potty
4:15 kids will claim they are bored and have nothing to do
4:20 bella will ask to take a nap with her binky (please note** she WILL NOT SLEEP)
4:30 kids will ask you what's for dinner and when it will be served because they will claim to be STARVING!
5:00ish dinner, ask bella to try going potty
5:30 color, play with dolls, playdough
6:00 bella will have an accident because she insisted she didn't need to go potty the last 6 times you asked her
6:30 wind down for bedtime, they will ask for as snack as soon as you ask them to brush their teeth
6:45 ask the to get into their pajamas, this will take 15 minutes, and bella might still be naked
7:00 ask them to get their beds & books ready, go potty
7:15 bella:books, sippy cup, songs, bed...don't mess up the words to anything, she will correct you
7:20 bella will call you in to tell you she forgot to say goodnight to madi
7:30 madi: books, songs, bed...don't mess up the words to anything, she will correct you
7:45 madi will get up and go potty, come downstairs to ask you what you are doing, and what time we will be home. she will then want another hug and for you to go back upstairs and tuck her into bed
8:00 you will think there is a truck in my house...don't worry..it's just madi snoring
you will watch tv, hangout, check your email, whatever...
as soon as you fall asleep bella will call you. when you get to her room she will tell you she dropped her binky. at this point you will get on your hands and knees in the dark and begin feeling around for it. she will be watching you and smiling
2:00AM you will be in a deep sleep having a pleasant dream. you will then hear bella calling for you.
you will go in her room where she'll smile at you and without even trying to move tell you she wet the bed. you will strip her down, change her pj's and put new bedding on the bed. she will watch you from her rocking chair, smiling. put her back to bed, turn on her music and don't try escaping the room before you sing twinkle, twinkle, little star.
go back to bed. you should be safe til the morning.
7:00AM madi will wake first, she'll come find you because she will be famished from her night sleep and need breakfast IMMEDIATELY! bella will follow in about 20 minutes...and the day repeats!!
The following is MY report of how the day went:
1:00 arrival/I'm sweaty from teaching dance need a shower. Kids jump on me and luckily today Bella decides she will talk to me right away.
1:15 Jockey with Jen's parents, Jen and Kevin for a quick shower. Send Mr. Botta to downstairs bathroom to shave.
1:17 Tell Jen to come in the bathroom while I shower. She continues telling me a story while opening the curtain so she can make direct eye contact.
1:30 Finish getting dressed, convince Jen she actually IS pretty, convince Mrs. Botta that no one will notice her smudged nail polish and her shoes will be fine, convince her that she actually IS pretty, say hi to Mr. Botta who wants to kill someone as they are behind schedule, tell Kevin I need the car seats in my car...he looks suspicious. And annoyed. And scared.
1:35 I am given 2 cameras and everyone pretends to look happy.
1:36 Where are the kids?
1:45 Everyone leave. Kids ask for a snack.
1:47 Kids ask to go to the playground.
1:55 Get ready for playground. We cannot find Bella's sneakers.
1:58 Bella actually does go potty. And tells me she needs practice 'wipin'
2:05 Shoes are on, on the road
2:08 Kids ask if we can go for ice cream after the playground. Of course I said yes. I probably want ice cream more than they do.
2:09 Madi tells me she wants to go to Skinners. I say I don't know how to get there. She does. I say no.
2:10 Madi tells me about her boyfriend.
2:10-2:15 Bella talks incoherantly in what I not refer to as 'Bellanese'. Madi asks why Bella is talking so much. I silently ask the same question.
2:20-3:00- Playground. Madi shows off and gets stuck on some monkey bars. Some guy (whose daughter is in Madi's class) has to help me get her down. Bella wants to do everything Madi does...even though she's too little. Madi wants to ride in the baby swing. I get numerous stares from parents everytime the kids yell 'Allah!!! Hey Allah!!'. Now I am concidered a terrorist threat.
3:05 Madi asks to go for ice cream. And to go to Skinners. She knows the way. For some odd reason..I trust her.
3:15 We make it safely to Skinner's. All with Madi's direction. What??
3:15-3:45 Ice cream. Blue Dinasaur crunch. Bella gets it on her face and in her hair. Then sits in a pile of it. Eats my ice cream and says she likes mine better. Madi comments on how fast I eat mine. I feel self concious.
3:50 On the road. Madi contemplates which way she wants to take me...she knows short cuts.
4:00 play on the swings and Madi takes pics of Bella and I with my phone. I am having palpitations because that shit is expensive.
4:10 Madi and Bella are so bored (because I haven't done ANYTHING entertaining with them clearly) and they want to watch a show
4:11 Madi claims to be starving and demands to know when dinner is. Begs for a snack. I am borderline abusive because I tell her she can wait until 5
4:12, 4:13, 4:14, 4:15, 4:16 Madi repeatedly claims she cannot wait for dinner. I ask her if she is going to continue to whine. She just had a snack before the playground and ice cream. She can wait 45 minutes. I tell her if I hear her tell me how starving she is again, dinner won't be until 6. Which is a lie. Madi pretends to faint.
4:30 I fold some laundry. Bella helps. She cannot fold. I let her fold something, I take it out and refold it. Repeat.
5:00 Ask the girls to pick up their stuff so mom and dad come home to a clean house. I make dinner. They fight about who is picking up more.
5:15 Dinner. Madi tells me she is a chicken monster. She asks me why I like 'Spicy Ranch'. Bella talks some more Ballanese.
5:30 Bella shoves me from behind. When confronted she says it was Madi. Madi is in her room. I ask her if she is lying. She says no. I tell her she won't have to go to time out if she tells the truth and apologizes, but she will if she lies. She looks afraid, yet lies again. I raise one eye brow. She apologizes. Then laughs at me. Rookie.
5:45-6:15 Bath. Both of them. Madi tells me I have to condition their hair. They then play 'hey squeeze my nose and something green will come out'. They learned this from some clown. Who is this guy? Snots are everywhere.
6:45 Madi says :Allah....(insert sad face) I didn't eat enough at dinner...I need a snack
6:50 Apples with Peanut butter and Nutella
7:00 Bella in Bed. Madi tells me: Allah...why didn't you bring milk? Bella gets milk at bed. I get milk. Madi says 'Allah, why are you only singing one song? She gets 3.' I didn't know the other 2. Madi sings them and pats Bella's head.
7:30 Books and bed for Madi. Success.
8:00 Madi is at the top of the stairs. 'Allah...my throat hurts.' Water, carry her back to bed. Rub her back until she snores...LIKE A TRUCK DRIVER.
8:30 All is quiet. I review the day. I am convinced Madi could have handled it all herself...as long as enough snacks were left out.
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